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Overcoming Loneliness

By Andy Gregory on January 22, 2014

A lonely girl in a coffee shop

It is normal for students to feel a little lonely when they arrive at university and at times throughout the year. The secret to feeling that you belong at a big place like UBC is to find a smaller place—a smaller group of people, a smaller community, within this larger community—and begin to meet others, one at a time. Loneliness is overcome one hello, one conversation, and one friendship at a time.

Ways to combat loneliness and build a supportive community

1. Live in residence. It’s one of the best ways to meet people, adjust and succeed at university.

2. Hang out in the residence lounge, not in your room.

3. Attend residence events—particularly those early in the year.

4. Eat with others. If you live in first year residence, your floor or house may have tables in the dining hall where they typically sit. Invite your roommates or floormates to go with you, or ask your Residence Advisor, who is likely heading that way to eat too—and would be glad to have company. If you go by yourself and there’s someone at the table you haven’t met, sit down near them and  introduce yourself!

5. Say hi to someone you don’t know. It’s the best pathway to friendship! Starting a conversation can feel intimidating, and it’s likely the other person is just as hesitant. Here are some great conversation starters:

  • How was your move in? When did you arrive?
  • Where do you call home?
  • What faculty are you in?
  • What are you going to do this weekend?

6. If you want company, leave your door open when you’re home. Fellow residents will stop and say hello.

7. Stay engaged on your floor or house social media accounts and check out the bulletin boards around residence that announce events and activities to see what’s going on and find some to check out. It’s fine to go by yourself!

8. Talk to a Residence Advisor. Ask them what activities they’re planning and let them know the kinds of things you would enjoy doing or trying.

9. Attend AMS Clubs Day or visit AMS Clubs to see if there’s a club that interests you. Successful students tell us that getting involved in campus organizations was a key factor in building campus connections.

10. Consider getting involved with your residence association!

11. If you continue to have a hard time and still feel lonely, you can talk with a Residence Advisor or the Residence Life Manager. RAs or RLMs can’t fix the problem—but they’ll listen and try to help you find the answer that works.

Additional Resources

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We acknowledge that SHCS and UBC are located on the traditional, ancestral, and unceded territory of the Musqueam people. We thank the Musqueam Nation for its hospitality and support of our work.

  
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  • Home
  • Getting Started
    ▼
    • Prospective Students
    • Returning Students
    • Graduate Students
    • Parents, Guardians and Families
    • Important Dates
  • Residences
    ▼
    • Residences Overview
    • Residences
      ▼
      • Acadia Park
      • Brock Commons – Tallwood House
      • Exchange
      • Fairview Crescent
      • Fraser Hall
      • Graduate Colleges
      • Iona House
      • Marine Drive
      • Orchard Commons
      • Place Vanier
      • Ponderosa Commons
      • Ritsumeikan-UBC House
      • tə šxʷhəleləm̓s tə k̓ʷaƛ̓kʷəʔaʔɬ
      • Thunderbird
      • Totem Park
      • Walter Gage
    • Rooms & Suites
      ▼
      • Shared Room
      • Connected Single Room
      • Single Traditional Room
      • Six Bedroom Suite
      • Four Bedroom Suite
      • Three Bedroom Suite
      • Two Bedroom Suite
      • One Bedroom Suite
      • Studio Suite
      • Nano Suite
      • Townhouse
      • Student Families
    • Residence Map
    • Indigenous Names
      ▼
      • Musqueam Names at tə šxʷhəleləm̓s tə k̓ʷaƛ̓kʷəʔaʔɬ
      • Indigenous Names at Totem Park
  • Applications
    ▼
    • Essential Application Facts
    • Important Dates
    • How To Apply
    • Fees & Payments
    • Eligibility
    • How We Assign Rooms
    • Residence Contracts
    • Cancellations
    • Refunds
    • Subletting
  • Dining
    ▼
    • Meal Plans
      ▼
      • Orchard Commons, Place Vanier & Totem Park
      • Suite-Style Residences
    • Where To Eat On Campus
  • Residence Life
    ▼
    • Residence Life Blog
    • Meet the Team
    • Community Living
      ▼
      • Rights and Responsibilities
      • Solving Problems
      • Living With Roommates
    • Residence Standards
    • Health & Safety
      ▼
      • Safety & Security
      • Health & Wellness
      • Counsellor in Residence
      • Fitness in Residence
      • Renter’s Insurance
      • Emergency Preparedness
      • COVID-19 Residence Rules
    • Services & Amenities
      ▼
      • Bed & Bath Linens
      • Sustainability Features
      • Residence Parking
    • Moving In
      ▼
      • Before You Leave Home
      • What Should I Pack?
      • Move In Day
      • Move In Market
      • Move In Day Volunteer Registration
      • Switches & Transfers
    • Get Involved
      ▼
      • Residence Programs
      • Professor in Residence
      • Grad Student Programs
    • Events
    • Student Family Housing
      ▼
      • Get Involved at Acadia Park
      • Moving In & Out of Acadia Park
    • Winter Break Residence Closure
      ▼
      • Welcome to your holidays in residence guide!
      • Your holidays in residence self-care guide!
    • Mindful Move Out
      ▼
      • Cleaning and departure checklists
  • Other Housing
    ▼
    • Living Off Campus
    • More Campus Housing
    • Visitor Housing
    • Commuter Student Hostel

  • Apply to Residence
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  • FAQ
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